Mrs. Dykowski... celebrates mothers

Mother’s Day is on Sunday, so get your orders to the flowers shops or pick up those nail salon gift cards, or if your mom is like mine, maybe a Tractor Supply gift card is more appropriate. 

Motherhood is the best job I’ve ever had, so I don’t really worry about the recognition this time of year. 

Part of that is also because, being in a very active phase of parenting, when the outcome is still uncertain, I’m less sure I actually deserve any recognition. 

No one but my kids are privy to all my parenting moments, and they definitely don’t always approve of my choices – but I hope someday they see those choices differently.

So when people say I’m doing a good job, I appreciate it, but I also don’t put a lot of stock in it. 

You didn’t see me the day Darci intentionally threw her breakfast dishes on the floor. 

You didn’t see the multiple puppy-related naptime meltdowns back in January. 

It feels good to be told I’m doing well, but at this point, no one really knows if I’m doing well. Not even me. 

Still I’ll just keep putting breakfast in dishes and insisting that playing with a stuffed animal is not an acceptable alternative to taking a nap. 

Time will tell if those are good mom decisions. 

Being a mom makes me appreciate mine more. Not just because she gives solid advice and is almost always willing to babysit when I really need her, but also because I understand now that being a mom to a strong-willed little girl is not easy. 

My mom always tells me that Darci is just like I was as a toddler — just a little more advanced. 

Naturally, I’m proud of her bright mind and strong spirit, but trying to stay a step ahead and not parent reactively is hard with a kid who is so quick witted. 

So I call my mom every few weeks to tell her I’m sorry for being a difficult toddler, and ask her what I can be doing to help Darci add to her stubbornness and intelligence a little more respectfulness and self control. 

It’s a battle all toddler parents face. Respect and self control are not inherent human traits, they have to be taught.

That’s necessary, but it’s not easy. 

So think about it when you make a good choice — like not running in the street with wild abandon, or not licking the shelves at the grocery store, or not hitting your sister — your mom probably helped give you the tools you need to curb those impulses. 

So maybe you can spring for the flowers and the fancy chocolate this year, but remember not to eat them yourself — you’ll ruin your dinner. 

Sarah Dykowski is the wife of Publisher Scott Dykowski. She can be reached at composing@dublincitizen.com

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